Read my short story, Al(m)as!


DA DA-DA-DA DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! [insert loud, obnoxious fanfare here]

Al(m)as has arrived!

Here is a promotional blurb from my Number 1 Fan:

I was glued to the story from the start.

A simple “fairy tale” story that the brother told over and over for various reasons — i.e., comfort, helping to fall asleep, hiding from the reality of their father’s addiction — turned into a powerful reality for the little girl who will not be held down.

The end gives a sense that she will thrive in life and be a inspiration to all who meet her in her future life. In spite of a tragic occurrence, the ending of this uplifting tale creates not despair, but optimism.

That, my friends, is a good story.

For ease of reading both on and offline, I’ve created a PDF version of the entire story. Download it here, or in the post header, or in the post footer, or in the blog sidebar (can you tell I’m excited?), or here, here, here: Al(m)as!

For those of you who don’t know, I’ve been working on a short story for the last month or so. To the wonderful people who have been reading and commenting, thank you so much — you have helped me immensely.

I don’t know if you have been annoyed with the title, but I have. Parenthesis just don’t belong in the middle of a title. Now, finally, you’ll see how the title is really supposed to look. And you can even find out what it means in my comments at the end. If you download it. Here. Al(m)as 🙂

Oh, and if you’re the sort of fantastic individual who likes giving feedback, here are some entirely optional guidelines for you:

Quick Feedback
  • If you’re pressed for time but still have a chance to read it, even a one-word response would be great. Something to tell me whether you liked it or hated it — hey, you could even respond with LIKE or HATE 🙂
  • If you have a bit more time, you could elaborate on why you reacted the way you did, and if can, reference individual parts of the story.
Detailed Feedback
  • Did the story capture and maintain your interest?
  • Was the plot believable, realistic, and engaging?
  • Was the introduction of the characters done well, or were you ever confused? (Wait, he’s fourteen?)
  • Did the portrayal of the characters and their interactions seem realistic?
  • Were the peaceful, descriptive scenes too boring, or did they paint a nice picture? Did the action scenes flow nicely, or did you ever get distracted from the action by too much description?
  • How was the ending?
  • Was there any prose that was unwieldy or distracting? Repetitive? Wordy? Awkward? Grammatically dubious? Overused adjectives and/or adverbs? How were my speech tags — too simple, too flowery?
  • How was the font and formatting? If you read it on an electronic device, did it work well for you?
  • Any other comments?

Thanks a billion! Feel free to shamelessly solicit my advice on something you’ve written, too.  But read mine first 😉


If I use @ symbols here, will I send a beacon out to those wonderful people who read this work in progress? What happens if there’s a space? Did I just page someone named symbols?

I don’t know, but I’m going to try it. The worst that can happen is that I’ll embarrass myself, and I do that on here all the time. @sophiebowns @Ronovan @Storytellers @Rebecca O’Hearn @Amelia Groves @Damyanti @Frausto @rybpierce @Marissa Bergen @Dennis Cardiff @gypsyess @Jessica L. Arant @Clayton @Storytime with John @Holistic Wayfarer @TK @Otrazhenie @flammeusgladius

If I just did something bad, I am SO SORRY.

10 thoughts on “Read my short story, Al(m)as!

  1. I didn’t read it because I came here while it was halfway, but I was actually planning on reading it as soon I have more time. Now it is a pdf, it will be even easier! I promise to read it and give feedback, as soon as I have had the time to fully read it.
    But I’ll do, for sure 🙂

      • I found his blog through yours, actually. I read his Shelter from Thunder and Slaughter in Barnaby Close. I HIGHLY recommend Thunder.

        Does he know? Hm. Not sure. If the little @ thingies work, maybe…

      • That’s so wonderful! He was one of the first followers we ever got (I started out on another blog). I’ve had the honour of reading some of his stories before they were published and got two of his books. At the time it was so encouraging to have someone reading what I wrote! 😀
        You should let him know! He’ll love it.

  2. Pingback: Readers, I need your help! | Behold the Infinite

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