Dear friend

Dear Friend,

You’re never there when I expect you.
You march up obnoxiously early.
You saunter in unfashionably late.
You don’t deign to come at all.

You make me anxious when you don’t visit.
You make me uncomfortable when you’re around.
You torment me till my stomach’s in knots.
You make me hate you (but not enough to wish you were gone).

You upset me.
You irritate me.
You hurt me.
You manipulate me.
You confuse me.
You anger me.

Remind me:

Why do I call you my friend, again?

Sincerely,

me

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22 thoughts on “Dear friend

    • Oh, dear. *badly suppressed giggle* I’m so sorry for laughing, I’m a terrible person. Thank you so much for your concern. But I’ll be fine, promise 🙂 Check out the tags.

      You’re totally right, though — it IS a pretty messed up relationship 😄

      • Hahaha oh god, hahaha 😀
        Well, at first I kind of thought it was about this and then I changed my mind again apparently.
        Still, loosen the bond, I don’t know how though 😉

      • Oh, the double entendres. I just asked a guy friend what he thought it was about, and after some prodding he said:
        A cat.
        Your cat?

        I died. And then his followup made me cackle maniacally into the sink as I brushed my teeth (I’m sure my flatmates think I’ve finally gone off the brink):
        haha
        how wrong am I?
        the UPS delivery man?
        (or woman)

        ROFL. Closer, but still no. Hahahahhahhaha. I pity all the poor male souls who liked this, none the wiser.

      • Hahahaha 😀
        Well, a cat would have made sense as well actually! But the stomach line kind of makes clear that it’s not about cats.
        At least, now it does for me 😉

  1. Very clever. 😀 I always envy those girls who have their friend come on time, at the same time, ever month. Mine just comes whenever the hell it wants to. At least it doesn’t stay long…

    Why does this feel like innuendo? haha!

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