Readers, I need your help!

The second edition of Al(m)as is here! A heart-wrenching tale of sibling love in a broken family, Al(m)as explores the power of the imagination to overcome all obstacles.

I promise it’s a short story — less than half an hour to read, and in convenient PDF form to read on or offline on all devices. Read it by clicking the image on my blog’s right sidebar, or

READ IT RIGHT HERE: Al(m)as, 2nd edition

This project is very close to my heart and I’m looking for any and all kinds of critiques, as I mentioned when I first published it. If you read it, I’ll love you forever. If you read it AND give feedback, well, we might just have to get married or something.

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23 thoughts on “Readers, I need your help!

  1. Okay, this time I’m actually going to read it. I’m going to stick it on my Kindle and take it with me. Next week I’ll have one less book to read (finishing my current freelance proofreading project today) so I’ll have no excuse. I apologise for never finishing reading it on the blog – you know how busy things get. But I really want to read this, and you’ve just given me a kick up the butt. So thank you!

    🙂

  2. A very well-written story, I liked the way you described the moments after the accident, seemed very real. Very touching as well… I could see how you got your inspiration from Michael Cargill, but you made this story your very own story.
    Ver well done! 🙂

    • Thanks so much! I’m so excited you read it!

      Just out of curiosity, what similarities did you see with Michael Cargill’s work? I imitated his format by putting it in PDF, but none of the content was (consciously) inspired by his stories.

  3. Good job. The story felt cleaner this time. At first I missed the older version because I felt more involved but then I at about the halfway point I liked that it ran a little easier. The ending was very powerful. I cried for the second time now reading that story.

    • Thank you so much! I’m glad you got a chance to finish reading. I’m pretty happy with the ending — I wrote the first two parts not knowing where the plot was headed, but after I mapped out the story as a whole, the ending came as a natural extension of the “wings” theme. It’s a bittersweet ending, sure, but there’s a strong note of hope in the middle of the melancholy, and that’s what’s most important.

  4. I loved this story. I was anyway tearing up a little while Patrick was waiting outside the ICU for news of Nellie, but the ending about being an angel with wings made me bawl. 😦 Really well written 🙂

    • Awww! Thank you so much! I’m glad to hear you liked it, and that it touched you in some way as well 🙂 It’s terrible of me, but nothing makes me happier than hearing that my writing made someone cry. It’s proof that the emotion of the piece came across.

      • Liked it? Hell no. I loved it! 🙂
        Pshaw. It’s not terrible at all. I agree! The emotions in this piece were heart-breakingly strong 🙂

  5. I must have missed the hospital part before. Because I want to say what I read stopped at the accident, but I know that must be wrong. I hate my memory problems at times. A sad story but more true than people think. Growing up too fast, both for the boy and the little girl. Perhaps the father grew up too.

    Coming from an alcoholic abusive father, I didn’t want to keep reading, but I did because you asked me to. The boy handled telling his sister at the end the right way I think.

    Much Respect
    Ronovan

    Thank you for the recent comments on my writing and articles. I know I am an awful writer in comparison to you. I can teach it apparently but I can’t do it. But you are very good, otherwise I would have been able to read the story without a problem.

    • Chances are, you read the individual parts as they came out — those ended at the accident, then the PDF included the parts plus the ending.

      Oh no, I’m sorry to bring up bad things from the past. Thank you so much for reading. I really appreciate your time and thoughts!

    • You’re very welcome. I’ve hit a dry spell with writing — no lack of inspiration, but the recent changes in my schedule I’ve been lazy with actually sitting down to write. So I’ve been at least trying to make the rounds and read other people’s work 🙂

  6. Fantastic story, Maria! There are a lot of poignant moments. The ringtone (Rrring! Rrring! Rrrrrrrrring) is perfect! I especially like the ending! 😀 Cheers to you and your editor…lol 😛

  7. Pingback: Imaginary Diary-Peeking | Behold the Infinite

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